Affirmations

Affirmations are short, positive statements you say or write to yourself, such as “I can handle this”, meant to steady you and push back against a harsh inner voice. In plain English, an affirmation is a declaration that something is true. In psychology the word also covers self-affirmation: reminding yourself of what you value, which research shows helps people cope with threat.

Also called: positive affirmations; self-affirmations; positive self-statements; daily affirmations; in Nigerian church language, confessions or declarations.

How it works

Two different things hide under one word.

Positive self-statements are the “I am worthy” kind. The idea is that repeating them crowds out negative automatic thoughts. The evidence for this is mixed, and for some people it backfires (see below).
Self-affirmation, in the research sense, means reflecting on your core values: your faith, your family, your honesty, your work. The theory, first set out by Claude Steele in 1988, is that when something threatens your sense of being a good and capable person, you get defensive, and defensiveness gets in the way of learning and change. Reminding yourself of what matters to you widens the picture, so one failure or one insult stops feeling like a verdict on your whole self.

Examples

Before an exam or interview: “I have prepared. I can only do my best today.”
After a mistake at work: “One error does not make me careless. I fix things.”
A values reflection, written in two minutes: why your family, or your faith, matters to you and what you did this week that lived it.
Everyday Nigerian ones: “It is well”, “I am a child of God”, “God’s got me”, said to steady yourself in a hard moment.

Benefits

A 2014 review in the Annual Review of Psychology summarised dozens of trials of values-based self-affirmation. Short writing exercises, done at the right moment, improved school results, health behaviour and relationship outcomes, and in some studies the benefits lasted months or years. The effect seems to come from lowering defensiveness, so people take in feedback, face a health warning or hear a partner without shutting down. Affirmations of this kind work best when they are true, specific and about what you value, not about what you wish you were.

Risks: when affirmations backfire

In a 2009 experiment, people with low self-esteem who repeated “I’m a lovable person” ended up feeling worse than those who did not, apparently because the statement clashed with what they believed and set off a chain of counter-arguments. People with high self-esteem felt only slightly better. So:

Keep statements believable. “I am learning to speak up” beats “I am fearless”.
Do not use affirmations to silence a feeling that needs attention, or to replace sleep, food, rest or help.
If repeating them leaves you flat or angry, stop. That is information, not failure.

In Nigeria

Affirmation is woven into Nigerian life: morning declarations in church, “positive confession” teaching, a mother’s blessing over a child leaving the house, the friend who says “you will not fail”. Much of this is a form of self-affirmation in the research sense, because it ties you to what you value and to the people who stand with you. The trouble comes when declaring wellness is treated as the whole answer, so that persistent low mood, sleeplessness or dread are hidden behind “it is well”. Those are signs to add help, not to declare harder. Faith and therapy sit together comfortably.

Affirmations vs self-talk vs self-compassion

Self-talk is the whole running commentary in your head, helpful and unhelpful. Affirmations are the deliberate, positive part of it. Self-compassion is speaking to yourself the way you would to a friend who is struggling, which does not require you to feel positive at all, and may suit you better if upbeat statements ring false.

When to get help

If your inner voice is harsh most days, or low mood and worry have lasted weeks, affirmations are not enough on their own. Our guide to self-esteem covers what helps, and you can book a licensed therapist on Mytherapist.ng for CBT and skills-based therapy, which works directly on negative thoughts.